The pain and hurt which i feel, go as deep as it is real; to be around and yet unseen, takes the water out of the steam.

It is raining.

I feel broken.

Perhaps this is the loneliest I will ever feel. Perhaps I can tell myself that if I can make it through tonight, I can make it through anything for I have dreaded this day all my life.

The man I love, who raised me, and who has loved me more than anyone ever has, my (grandfather) Oupa Mike died round 3am this morning. Peacefully and without pain.

No matter what I have done (…… and I have fucked up plenty), to him, I have always been enough. Unconditionally accepted and loved – never judged, always forgiven.

At the feet of this giant, I stand in awe and wonder, for in this life I was loved – by him.

10 June 2010 020

14 thoughts on “The pain and hurt which i feel, go as deep as it is real; to be around and yet unseen, takes the water out of the steam.”

  3. Chris, words cannot express the sadness one feels and for the sympathy i extend forth in the memory of a great man, a man of all ages, and one who richly loved you, unconditionally.

    Viva La Oupa Mike

    with all my love, Tim

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  4. Now just look at me crying. Baby…he was more than your Oupa. I understand that. He knew that. I wish I was there. Lots of hugs and I love you baie.

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