Dear family, friends and other interesting creatures –
1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?
I drank water from a mountain stream, went 4x4ing, Noid took me on a helicopter ride and we stood on top of a mountain, ate at a Chinese restaurant, and visited the Kyalami race track and a cricket stadium… I did many things this year I’ve never done before this year.
2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions and will you make more for next year?
Last year I vowed not to weight myself this year, but that lasted roughly six months and I also said that I would like to “let somebody in”… which I did. I wake up next to him every morning and go to sleep with him next to me every night.
Next year…. I want to continue loosing weight, I need to continue working on separation emotion from self and I need to start walking again. Also stick to my zero tolerance for bullshit rule.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
No… but Jax and Mouse are both pregnant so next year will be a different story. I look forward to taking pictures of the babies.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Last close death to me was Oupa Mike on 12 December 2007.
5. What countries did you visit?
Lesotho! Finally a stamp in my passport.
6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
16 January 2008 – the day I met, moved in and started my life with Noid.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
“Letting someone in” to a very broken heart was not easy as I felt very vulnerable and scared to be hurt… but I am glad I did. Healing some past experiences within myself with regards to my past. Arriving at the end of a very tough year in better shape emotionally and physically than the year before.
9. What was your biggest failure in 2008?
Slow internal progress on some things, but progress is progress I guess…. Doing the same thing, expecting different results…. not always standing up for myself… but more concrete, before I met Noid I did 4km, 3 times a week and that just disappeared after I met him. Why I have no idea.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
The usual nonsense besides falling on the ice on the Sani Pass and hurting my ankle and knee which hurt for months afterwards.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
I have bought very little this year because I just don’t have the finances, so nothing stands out. However I received beautiful, fun and fabulous gifts.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Noid. He has persevered with his tough work year and committments and overcame many obstacles while working on his relationship with me and the many, many, many children.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
A number of people’s behavior and reactions has negatively impacted on how I feel about relationships generally and my walls going up have been activated. I’ve learned that I am not as trusting as I thought I was… and unless I make a decision to redirect my thinking, my core, default feeling is still ‘In the end there is me. I can count on me.”
14. Where did most of your money go?
Food, petrol, paying bills – nothing fanTy.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
The tour of the Drakensberg / Lesotho with Noid in August of this year. I thrive on time alone with the man I love.
16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
“Islands in the stream”. We were at a charity function and Noid sang it in my ear sitting next to me. I had no idea he even knew the words.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) Happier or sadder? Much happier.
b) Thinner or fatter? Thinner!! Even though my ass is still the size of Ghana I am smaller than what I was on my 30th birthday. Amusing since I’m still just fat.
c) Richer or poorer? Richer I suppose if you consider my debt is getting less – very slowly.
18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Laugh; enjoy the ‘details’ and spend time with my children and friends – especially Mel because she really is THERE for me. Breathe. Relax. Let things be. BELIEVE.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Stress over the little things, worry about crap I can’t change.
20. How do you plan on spending Christmas?
I just want a relaxing day with a pretty table setting with Noid and the kids.
21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
Yes. In a big way that changed who I am.
22. How many one-night stands?
Many. All with Noid.
23. What was your favorite TV program?
Shark. Boston Legal.
24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Nope, I still “hate” the usual suspects.
25. What was the best book you read?
Nothing really stands out. I continue to enjoy Patricia Cornwell, Mary Higgins Clark and Nora Roberts.
26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
27. What did you want and get?
Somebody to intimately be a witness to my life, who is actively involved and who holds my hand.
28. What did you want and not get?
A ‘square diamond’. Well, it is not truly a diamond, it’s an Amethyst.
29. What was your favorite film of this year?
30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 35. I went to dinner with Noid, his mom, dad and his kids.
31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Nothing really… It’s been a huge learning curve of a year in a good way…but I love warm and fuzzy and lots of affection. It makes me feel safe so I can never have enough of that.
32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
I have not bought a single item of clothing the entire year, so I guess whatever fashion concept I had last year – frumpy, boring. I don’t think I have ever felt this unattractive and unsexy (is that a word?) in my life…
33. What kept you sane?
Intimacy. Laughter. Affection.
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I like Colin Farrell.
35. What political issue stirred you the most?
I cannot believe that Robert Mugabe is STILL in power. It is unbelievable.
36. Who did you miss?
Oupa Mike mostly.
37. Who was the best new person you met?
Noid! … However a number of acquaintances became close friends like QB… my balcony buddy.
38. Tell us what valuable life lessons you learned in 2008.
I learned that I am powerful beyond my own imagination in many ways – positively and negatively.
Wishing you all well over Christmas, the holiday celebrations and the year to come.
New Year’s eve is like every other night; there is no pause in the march of the universe, no breathless moment of silence among created things that the passage of another twelve months may be noted; and yet no man has quite the same thoughts this evening that come with the coming of darkness on other nights.
~Hamilton Wright Mabie
With love –