Lost at sea, I see you shine for me.

A room filled with strangers, feeling alone. Observing. Going to bed. The one you love next to you but a galaxy away. Your name called, you turn and reply as reflex. The words not fitting your mouth and empty gaze.

Hell. The disconnection from one we favour. Lost.

Heaven. The reconciliation. Found.

Posted via WordPress for BlackBerry from the second cloud on your left.

Oppa Gangnam Style!

Dear friends and other interesting creatures,

Wanna read some stuffs?

* Those are my Oppa Gangnam Style pant! I l♡ve that video. Thanks to Kevin I at least know about it. Ha ha! Nahhh they just my Bad Boy pant I bought from “Jam” at R20 – yes I am cheap, but never easy – in my head I imagine I can dance like that with those pant on. 🙂

* I have a sinus and lung infection. I am not loving it. Day 3 of not being able to breathe. The anti-biotics prescribed are like huge submarines and a challenge to swallow. Best getting better rushes in!

* Today is the first time in five months that I am not selling Tranquil Body Treats at Rosebank @rooftopmarket. I did try to find someone to run my small shop tomorrow but I shall accept sometimes I can’t control everything. I will be back next week however!

* Noid very kindly brought us supper home on Friday as well as flowers for me and Kyla as we are both sick. It was an unexpected and happy surprise. Thank you.

* Kyla likes playing with the bread machine. She has made bagels, french loaf and garlic bread. I encourage that behaviour!

* I made a pot of tea yesterday. It reminded me of our Liam James. He is very proper that way.

* The neighbour just turned on his lawn mower at just after 8am on a Sunday. He is disturbing my bath time silence.

Okay I wish you enough,

PS: http://www.allkpop.com/2012/07/behind-the-music-psy-oppa-is-gangnam-style

Posted via WordPress for BlackBerry from the second cloud on your left.

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful boy

Hello friends and other interesting creatures,

As an observer, I have often looked for likeness with all my kids.

Initially I have thought our Liam James and I are the most similar, we are funny and loud or full of crap generally but lately I have found that there are moments he has an emotional maturity for clarity I have not reached. His *smile* is actually very much his Aunty Jill.

Victoria is my physical mini-me which she doesn’t l♡ve. L☺L She really can sing and write like me, but her mannerisms and clumsiness is very much her Dad.

In fact, I have realised that Kevin and I are the most alike and connected… on many levels. If he likes it or not, his frown is 100% Oupa Mike, his quick wit and ability to be equally offensive and finding the unacceptable funny is very me, while the maths gene must be from his father. Music is from Dad, no question and perhaps a cloud of melancholy which I wish I could have spared him.

Kev and I grew up together. He is my son, companion, protector, date, entertainer, helper, chef… he has seen all my victories and mistakes. He has cried and laughed with me. We have fought and forgiven. We have agreed to disagree.

Neither of us are perfect by any means.. but we are very human. His heart is gold and he deep down he believes like me, that to be vulnerable is to be alive, although it brings the most pain. It is also the bravest in my opinion.

On Friday evening I attended a ballroom concert with Victoria where she took this photograph and said “That’s our Kevin”. I had a small cry.

This is the most captivating, truthful “picture” of my “Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful – beautiful boy” in the words of John Lenon, I have ever seen.

I wish you a son in flight with music as his words,

35 days till Thanksgiving

* I am thankful for all the Waltons who helped at the function this am. I really appreciate it. Especially Noid with the gazebo.

* I am thankful for a bread machine.

* I am thankful that Victoria complimented my hair.

* I am thankful for a good night kiss.

* I am thankful Kyle survived an accident with his bike tonight. On receipt of the call, I once again knew some people are born from your heart and lives in your soul.

Kyle's destroyed bike

Kyle’s destroyed bike

Kyle's destroyed bike

Kyle’s destroyed bike

Ja, so?

It seems October is the month that my teeth decide they MUST have some random root canal. Three years running.

Anyway, as I was bathed, dressed and ready I was thinking:

* Should I wear my glasses or contact lenses? Do I want to see the dentist coming towards me? Could always close my eyes?

* Shall I wear mascara or not? Do I plan on having a small cry? Big girl panties! …. not because I am brave but because I am fat so big panties is required regardless.

* Perhaps anti-anxiety meds were needed. Can you hear Simon Cowell say “ It’s a YES!” I added kick ass schedule 5 slow release pain killers to the mix. Just in case!

* Is the medical aid going to pay this monster bill? I dunno. Worry later, in pain NOW. The Power of Now, see I am very new age.

* Is my shirt sitting proper or will the dentist be checking out my cleavage. Nun outfit.

* I must wear closed shoes. I desperately need a pedicure. Can’t have the dentist looking at my disgusting feet with Brixton type chipped nail polish.

In the end the dentist as his very funny assistant were nice people. Lots of conversation about my tattoos and how the world need more individuals (Yay!!) and less conforming.

I did wear glasses and took them off while they worked, I wore mascara and closed shoes… and I refrained from asking about how much this is all gonna cost. Think they will hit me with that when I go back next week.

Root canal anyone?

I wish you enough,