Bacon.  The story of a pig. 

Dear friends and other interesting creatures,

It started when the x person and I bought a house just after my 18th birthday. I realised I could have a party!

Hosting a party carried on into my second marriage, where it became more church and family focussed. Gatherings,  afternoon teas and surprise parties.  I remember my (step)  Dad’s dad,  Oupa Bert saying I was the most gracious hostess ever and what a treat it was to visit.

My childrens birthday parties were well attended,  every detail perfectly planned celebrations. As soon as a party was finished,  the birthday boy or girl would start planning their next birthday party. It was something I excelled at. I loved it.

Then the sickness came.  May 2011.

Since our move from estate living, where the river ran through it, to urban living in an area for the newly weds and the nearly deads, @SirNoid and I had totally stopped entertaining at home.

Our previous residence saw me effortlessly inviting fifty of our closest friends for a catered chef cooked meal to perfectly cooked steaks by the resident chef, @SirNoid.

Any reason I could ever come up with would warrant a dinner party.  My Mammie said to me she has no idea from whom I got this “let’s entertain!” flair from, but I loved it. My Mammie is a very private person and doesn’t need people the way I do.

The only thing I miss about having a big house with a garden to groom and a pool to keep blue is the space to entertain.

Yet….. Do I want a big house again? I don’t think so. The rain would have turned the garden into a jungle and the pool into a swamp. I did not enjoy having to colour chart those things.

I love that we can pretty much “lock up and go”. I have no security fears where we live. We have enough space not to share a bathroom, and @SirNoid still has a “man cave” to smoke in.

Now our entertainment is meeting our friends at restaurants (without play areas). Watching a football match in a pub and drinks before a show. Movies and arranged events.

The circle of life. The difference between raising a family and being a couple in the urban jungle?

Oh yes. I need to buy bacon.

I wish you enough,

Wenchy 🦒

Advertisements

@SirNoid ♡ @NocturnalWenchy 


Who is older?

@SirNoid is older as girls have started calling him “Oom“.  I’m #14forever. You do the math. ♡

How long have you been together? 
Since 12th of January 2008.

Who is the most sensitive? 
I am hyper sensitive and hurt emotionally and physically very easily. I laugh as loudly as I cry.

@SirNoid cries at Disney movies and adverts. I’m not sure if that means he is sensitive or appreciate the performing arts.

Where do you eat out most as a couple? 
Wherever @SirNoid gets invited to join me at a #foodie event, we dining out as a couple! ♡ (Can you feel the lack of budget tonight…? )

@SirNoid has become a #foodie in his own right, especially craft beer. Proud of him

Who has the quick temper? 
Coming from an Italian/ Portuguese background I have a red, hot temper. There is a reason I decided never to own a gun. I would take you out. I would not feel bad.  You clearly needed to go. I learned that lesson during my first marriage.

@SirNoid may have been born in Welkom but his temper matches mine.

Who is more social? 
I’m exceptionally more social the older I get… I care less and less how others feel about me,  which is scary and I started off on a rather low scale.

@SirNoid…  I think depends on the company.

Who is the most stubborn? 
I’m actually not sure. Imagine we had a child!

Who wakes up earlier? 
We both wake up when @SirNoid ‘s alarm goes off.

Do you get flowers often? 
No

Who is the first one to admit when they’re wrong? 
Me.  @SirNoid is never wrong.

Who has the craziest ex’s? 
There has been some hectic times but thankfully normality has settled.

Who wears the pants in your relationship? 
@SirNoid 

Who cries more? 
Me.  I am a dramatic art. Dammit.

Who said “I love you” first? 
@SirNoid

Who is the better cook? 
@SirNoid

Who is more messy? 
I am.

Who’s the best driver? 
Me  when @SirNoid is not in the car. (ha ha😵!)

Who makes the Coffee / Tea? 
I make coffee ☕  in the morning and at night. Something has to be an apology for my crappy cooking right?

BTW, what coffee do YOU buy? 

… He believes in me, I don’t know what he sees in me …

… trespassing on a farm outside Clarens in August 2008. We parked our day old 4×4 on the highest, smallest ledge on a koppie, after playing in the stream.

Dear friends and other interesting creatures,

From the beginning he was all in. While I analysed the unexpected love, devotion and absolute certainty he possessed about our future (not to mention the chunks of sexy that was coming my way), he was mixing our CD’S and DVD’s which at the time closed my throat with anxiety.

I came into the relationship with a healthy dose of fear, a mountain of debt, a geyser that kept flooding the basement and many children.

By the time he unpacked a reasonable amount of books, I felt more at ease with whatever amount of baggage he came with.

Continue reading

Check your mate

Dear friends and other interesting creatures,

Random thoughts:

* My anxiety is playing up at the moment and I am not loving it. My default emotion is anxiety so it does not require an event to plague me. It is not fanTy. Forgive me if I am not as chatty as usual. Although … I’ve become really good at hiding these issues.

* I love my husband, @SirNoid. He won a big ass TV and put it in our room for me toimage watch DVD’s. Not that I watch DVD’s all day long but it made me feel special that he did that. I do not want it hooked up to our DSTV! Perfect just like that.

Oh yes, dear @SirNoid gives magnificent massages. Not sure if I could return the favour in an equally fabulous manner with my lovely illness inflamed hands, but I will try.

* Before you pick up your phone to call me, think… Is this textable? I do not answer the phone (deep psychological reasons which surfaced after my Oupa Mike died. No therapy did not help). So, unless I gave birth to you, or I let you sleep in my bed, don’t phone me. I am not going to answer. Text or email. Flowers (yellow roses really do the trick) is lovely, and you are welcome to WhatsApp me. On the odd occasion that I may call YOU, know that you are incredibly special!

* I need to colour my hair at least every 7 to 10 days for the optimum #purplehairdontcare look. Been just over 18 months of having totally purple hair and I am loving it ! Even my @SirNoid loves it ….and he was very sceptical in the beginning. 💜

* After five or so years, it appears our furniture needs replacing… as does our linen. Electrical appliances seem fine but our bedroom, bathrooms, lounges etc need some attention / updating / love. How long does these things last in your house?

* @SirNoid and I do not share a bathroom. Very progressive thinking I must say. My husband says I’m odd to not share a bathroom, but why not, if you have another bathroom that isn’t being used? Would you like your own bathroom?

* ♡ I am posting my birthday #wishlist tonight, as requested. I love that I still get asked to do this. 😄 My friends are so proper.


image
I’m posting this as a request from my friend Janice who tagged me on Facebook.

Four names I go by:
1. Momma / Mother/ Mom
2. Nancy / Nancy Pants
3. Aunty Stel
4. Wenchy / #MammaWenchy

If in any doubt, Wenchy is the name to go with (no surname – think Madonna, Cher – they don’t need surnames and neither does Wenchy).

Only my Mammie and Bank Manager calls me by my proper name. When my name is mess up. it annoys me LOTS. It is Christel-Michel or Wenchy. I dislike being called Chris, although I guess that would be the natural way to go for people who want to be friendly but don’t know me well. Yes, I may have some issues.

(My close family and perhaps those who would give me a kidney …call me Stel. I’m old fashioned that way, so respectfully, kids get to call me Aunty Stel.)

Four places I’ve lived:
1. In my head
2. In your computer
3. Potchefstroom
4. Johannesburg

Favoured things I love to watch on TV:
1. Game Of Thrones
2. The Blacklist
3. Chicago Med / Greys Anatomy
4. Blue Bloods

Four favourite places I have visited:
1. Victoria Falls (Zimbabwe)
2. Uvongo Lagoon where the water is forever deep (South Africa)
3. Pebble Beach at Storms River Mouth in the Tsitsikamma National Park (South Africa)
4. Grahamstown (The National Arts Festival, South Africa)
…..and as a bonus:
5. McGregor (South Africa)
6. Top of Sani Pass (Lesotho)
7. Drakensberg (South Africa)

Four things I love to eat:
1. Crème Brulee
2. Baked Cheese Cake
3. Pork Belly
4. Rare Fillet Steak

Favourite drinks I love to have:
1. Water
2. Strawberry Daiquiri
3. Cappuccino
4. Salted caramel milkshake

Four books I adore:
1. Tuesdays With Morrie by Mitch Albom
2. Perks Of Being A Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky
3. Seks, Drugs en Boeremusiek deur Koos Kombuis
4. The Fault In Our Stars by John Green

Four people I TRUST will respond ( … and not be beige!) You can either respond on your blog, or in my blog comment section, or Facebook , but please tag me :

1. Birthsay Girl Jenny
2. Our Ky
3. My #bestie Gail
4. Tayla-Jade
….and bonus, dear 5. Shell (You can also join her group (all about beads) while you at it!)

Anyone else who wants to play is very welcome! 😇

I wish you enough,
Wenchy

“What makes the desert beautiful,” said the little prince, “is that somewhere it hides a well…”

Dear friends and other interesting creatures,

I have readers, loyal and long suffering readers that have been around 20 years next year (party?), and when I don’t blog, they text, email or whatsapp me messages to ask “Everything ok?” “You ok?”You gotta love it, right?

Thank you for knowing me well enough not to phone me. No idea however why I have not received flowers, cupcakes or chocolate…. although to be perfectly honest, if you can deliver low carb meals, snacks or general groceries to my house I will be forever grateful. #Smile

Everything is OK. I am permanently completely exhausted. Not tired, not need a break, not take the day off… It’s a much more intense level of EXHAUSTION. Although in all honesty, I do believe @SirNoid and I are in need of a serious holiday.

It is on an I can’t deal, I can’t think, I can’t remember,  I can’t reason, I’m too sore, it’s too much, please help me, without me asking, kinda tired.

Naturally having very close to no iron in my body, does contribute towards my levels of exhaustion.

It is VERY unpleasant and I’ve really fallen very much out of love with having no energy. None. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. Medically. Every level I may have skipped, please include it, and tick that box.

December and some of January, I was in severe pain, not coming downstairs, just staying in bed, “wish me luck as you wave me goodbye” kinda pain. Christmas, New Year is all a blur really.

I felt very aware of how scary or helpless this must have been for @SirNoid, but also for our 15 year old son Douglas. I think it was one of the first times Doug saw me mid pain attack, crying, asking @SirNoid to help with small things. Pour water, help me down the stairs, covering my legs like I’m 104 years old because the heat and the little pressure helps the pain,  while other times having any fabric touch my skin0 is hell. It is very confusing for all of us!

@SirNoid like many, expresses his helplessness and wanting to make it better, in getting angry, … but I’ve come to realise I don’t know who to direct my anger at. This acceptance bit is a bitch. I’m nowhere near accepting any of this.

I feel excessively exposed and vulnerable… Chronic illness has stolen from me, my husband and children which leaves me with more pent up anger.  Yes, it has been suggested a bit of counselling may go a long way.

I saw a new Rheumatologist &  Specialist Physician this past week.  For someone with “ailments”, I actually do not enjoy going to the doctor.

She was very proper and I liked that she saw ME, and spoke to ME as a person and not a number. The consultation was all consuming and as she predicted by the time I was done,  I felt a small tractor may have driven over me.

She has requested previous documents from other doctors and off course, ran more tests. She wants to compile a time line and see which of the illnesses is doing what, and seriously attack the anemia and find out why my body doesn’t hold onto iron.

The Fibromyalgia and Ankolysing Spondylitis can put on quite a show I tell you!

Looking at my anemic self, she took me off certain meds and gave me more pain meds to take until we have a plan of action.

Grown-ups never understand anything by themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them. –  Le Petit Prince (1943)

I don’t know the answers, only to try every day . Sometimes successfully and others not.

I wonder if anyone truly knows how much goes into pretending I’m feeling well?
image
I wish you enough,
Wenchy