Dear friends and other interesting creatures, Ouma’s room felt calm with soft light… she looked worse and better then I imagined – making no sense at all I am. She is nothing like the woman she use to be, but when I lay down beside her, she took my face in her hands and I... Continue Reading →
The summers were sweltering. Walking towards a braai fire to greet you, I remember the extra warmth of the fire clearly. I remember your smile and the true happiness as we said hello. You had clearly already started the Merry part of Christmas. I expected nothing less. You always were more of a bottle than... Continue Reading →
Dear friends and other interesting creatures, You were my first love as a little girl. Waiting for you to come home from the Airforce. A R5 tucked into my hand when nobody looked. The first man to buy me perfume. A comfort after my father died. A man who assured me how loved I am... Continue Reading →
Dear friends, family and other interesting creatures,
Some bonds cannot be broken. Not even in death.
It may be 17 years since Tim died, but I had a very real sense of him yesterday. I could not understand why he lingered yesterday. Nothing out of the ordinary happened. Usually I am able to pin point an emotional from him, a smile, a look in his eye – yesterday I just felt him here.
He always visits, sitting on the right hand side of the bed, regardless of venue. Before he died, we had never even been in a bedroom together before.
Seeing Tim isn’t scary or creepy. It can be both comforting and heart breaking. Sometimes I smile, other times I feel renewed grief.
I am not big on “speaking to the dead”, or “crossing over”. I’m merely relating that somehow Tim keeps contact. Often followed up the next day or two in a quote or a song, an item that was of value only to us.
Have you ever experienced anything like this?
I wish you enough,
I’ve told you before. The thing with death is, I have no new pictures of you. So I had to improvise a little.
As I have been preparing for my Grahamstown festival trip next month, I could not help but think of you. Do you remember?
You were in school uniform. Matric blazer. I was sitting on the steps of the church on the square in Grahamstown. I went to a private school so no uniform. I remember I was wearing a very stretched out purple jersey and brown leather shoes I had bought at the festival.
(Remains the most expensive shoes I’ve ever owned. Haha! I would much rather buy books. I had no idea at the time how much purple was still to follow.)
The sun was setting.
You came and sat next to me. I had never seen you before. You sat, silently. I remember…
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Dear friends and other interesting creatures, You were walking along soaking up your own details, getting by and then life events comes and kicks you up the ass... and suffocates your heart. Some of it pours out your eyes. Sean: Do you have a soul mate? Will: Define that. Sean: Someone you can relate to, someone who opens... Continue Reading →